I am PMSing

Yeah. Thinking a lot.

Past few days like mood abit bad. Maybe damn bad. Those around me better watch out for this weird ass person stomping her way around. That’s me. -.-

Sometimes, you just feel so lost in being yourself… You want this, yet the others want that and since you don’t want to be alone you want what the others want although that is not what you actually want and you end up deluding yourself that you are happy with it and you can do whatever you want some other day.

Or maybe you are unwilling and you say NO and all the others end up unhappy and you have to end up unhappy since the whole mood of the group is like bad.

So you weigh out these 2 situations and you find yourself agreeing that the first option is better. So just hide this unhappiness and forget it. The feeling will go away.

But in the very end, this unhappiness is accumulated and you seem to be lost in being yourself or not being a spoil market. I guess sacrifices have to be made in order for relationships to work out. If I do go around wanting my way all the time, I will end up being disliked by a lot of people and stuff.

So in a sense being considerate to others will mean being inconsiderate to youself yet it is actually being considerate since you will have a better life being liked by people?

I am abit confused by the thoughts in my mind now.

Maybe it was from reading my lit text, if I think too much about this kind of stuff, I will end up dead like some poets… -.- But I am feeling very angsty now. All thanks to the stupid racist comment.

When you are a kid, the images that revolve around you are unclear. Yet you have such great memories about childhood as all you remember are happy times. You do not feel extensively for people around you as you slowly grow up and learn about feelings and emotions. (That is probably why I pushed this poor girl down the slide when I was a kid, sorry dude) Yeap. Now, this kinda stuff won’t happen, cause you will just think of the pros and cons to a situation. Should I do this, should I not do this. Should I go with the crowd, should I speak up about what I feel. Sometimes you become more daring, only to be bitten and thus, you grow scared of the matter.

You shrink slowly as life grows on.
Irony…
As you grow up, you are shrinking…

Hurmm….

Thoughtful.

As I said, if we think so much about stuff, we will end up dead like some poet. SO, think happy thought ppl. HAPPY THOUGHTS!

Also, whatever it is, when in a dilema about life, and about your identity, just know that you are living in the way God wants you to can liao. Who cares about others. I am myself and I don’t care what others think of me.

🙂

Land before time: Let your heart guide you… 🙂

Always look on the bright side of life,
Xioahui

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